


Where do you go when you sleep?

by Donthavesexwithsam



Category: Wolf 359 (Radio)
Genre: A lot of cursing, And feels, F/M, I love to curse, Sadness, Sickness, Sorry Not Sorry, Unplanned Pregnancy, cursing
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-12-15
Updated: 2016-02-20
Packaged: 2018-05-06 23:42:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,230
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5435201
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Donthavesexwithsam/pseuds/Donthavesexwithsam
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Saving a girl from a drunk in a bar doesn't always end in space travel- but for Doug Eiffel, that is exactly what happened. This fanfic is based on a really good story idea by Covinskey and Smilodonmeow- I'll post a link in the notes.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Out of the fire...

**Author's Note:**

> I've been looking for a link FOREVER- and I will add it once I've found it. Yay me for taking screenshots but not pressing the g-damn like button. YAY. Also, if there's any spelling mistakes it's because I'm a literal idiot.

It wasn't often that Doug was bored in a bar, but then again, he knew that going out with his sister, Cath, often ended in him going home alone, because he had to baby her in the bar too much to pick up a girl of his own, but she would always go home with the least shady guy.

She was currently making out the only boy who had made it through Doug's death stare, so that was job done for tonight. One last beer and then he should head home.

He checked his watch. Might just make it in time to catch the Simpsons reruns.

"C'mon girl," he heard slurred next to him. "L'mme buy you a drink."

"I already said no," the girl was obviously uncomfortable, leaning back against the bar as the drunk closed in on her. Heavy breaths of whiskey smell wafted from him, as if he was drenched in it.

"Pretty girl like you, shouldn't be alone out here," he closed in to kiss her, and Doug decided it was enough.

"She's not alone." He said, putting an arm around her shoulder. "Do you know this guy, Casey?"

The girl briefly frowned, but seemed to get it all of a sudden. "No, I don't." She replied. "He was offering me a drink."

"Ah, no need to man," Doug nodded. "Come on, let me get you a drink and you just leave me and Casey to it, if you get what I mean."

He winked.

The drunk guy winked back, but it didn't really work out. He was really far gone.

Doug bought him a glass of water and he stumbled off, onward to bully another young girl.

"I didn't need your help," the girl said. "Could have done it myself easily."

"Uhm..." Doug frowned. "Gee, thanks Doug, would've sufficed."

The girl sighed. "Out of the fire..."

"I'm not here to swoop you up and take you home, Megara," Doug took a sip of his beer. "I smelled whiskey on that guy from three miles away, so I thought I'd help you out."

He dug in his pockets for his cigarettes. "Now, if you will excuse me, I'm going to suck cancer in my lungs."

He walked away, a little annoyed at the girl. Maybe if she stopped assuming every single guy was an asshole, she could be a nice girl and have a real boyfriend to protect her from drunkards.

He sighed, blowing out the smoke. He always saw it as a nice breathing exercise, even though it completely fucked up his lungs.

And who was he to tell her to get a boyfriend. If she wanted to be alone in a bar drinking, she should be left alone.

_Geez. He was an asshole too..._

He drained his beer, extinguished his cigarette and closed his jacket, ready to go, when he felt a hand on his shoulder.

"Doug?" He heard behind him. "It was Doug right?"

He turned around and saw the girl standing there, two beers in hand and an apologetic smile on her face.

"I'm sorry," she said. "For being such an ice queen, it's just..."

Doug shook his head: "Don't worry about it, okay? I'm just, it's unfair that you can't go out by yourself without risking getting molested, raped or beaten."

She smiled, offering him the beer. "Peace?" She asked.

He accepted it and tapped the side of her glass with his. "Peace."

"Come back inside," she proposed. "It's freezing, and I'd like to chat." She shrugged. "And besides, going out alone is not as sexy as it seems."

Doug laughed, and she turned around to go back in.

"Wait!" He called after her. "What's your name? You know mine, so..."

"Alex." She said. "Alex Dickinson.”

They walked back in, and Doug took his coat off again, sliding into one of the boots.

“It’s actually Alexis,” she continued chatting. “Because my mother is a horrible person.”

“If it makes you feel any better,” Doug shrugged. “My full name is Douglas.”

She shook her head. “It doesn’t, because I actually quite like the name Douglas. Would you mind if I called you Douglas instead of Doug?”

“Nah,” Doug took a drag of his beer. “It doesn't really matter to me. What’s in a name anyway,”

They continued to chat for a bit, Doug told Alex about his life, and Alex told him about hers. Not at all superficial, but not too deep either. She was nice, this girl, and Doug was getting drowsy, his senses numbed by the alcohol.

Around four in the morning, the bartender came up to them. “Last round guys,” he said.

Doug looked at Alex; “But we’re not done talking yet,”

He didn’t want to leave her already, he was very much charmed by her appearance and personality, and generally, he wanted to spend more time with her. He opened his mouth to invite her to his place, but swallowed his words when the more responsible side of his drunk-ass brain reminded him of how they met.

“If you were going to invite me over,” Alex smiled. “Please do.”

Doug frowned. “Are you sure?”

She nodded. “Yes, Douglas. At least you don’t stink of whiskey.”

They walked the four blocks to Doug’s apartment in silence, both tired and drunk, stealing kisses along the way. Back home, Doug parked her on the couch and went to get wine.

When he returned though, she was sleeping.

Softly, he set the wine glasses down and picked her up. It was a little harder than his drunk ass suspected, but he managed to stumble to the bed. He took off her shoes and socks (he hated waking up hungover with socks on), tucked her in silently and retreated to the living with a blanket and a spare pillow he nicked from his mother.

He locked the front door, then wrote a note to Alex in case she woke up before he would, and crawled on the couch. The moment he put his head down, he was asleep.


	2. A Parks and Recreation reference

When Doug woke up, he could see that it was already two in the afternoon, and he was starving.

Rubbing his head, he picked up the phone to order a pizza, when he suddenly remembered that there was a girl in his bedroom.

He peeked his head around the corner, and saw she was still sleeping soundly, all wrapped up in the comforter.

Her clothes were piled on the floor, so she had been awake at least once to undress. Doug walked back to the phone.

“ _ Hello? hello? _ ” it sounded through the receiver.

“I was busy, sorry,” Doug apologized to the Domino’s employee. “This is Douglas Eiffel.”

“ _ Oh, mister Eiffel! _ ” The guy said. “ _ One pineapple and ham? _ ”

“Make it two this time.” Doug grinned.

“ _ We’ll be there in half an hour. _ ”

Doug hung up the phone and went to take a quick shower. When he got out, he pulled on sweatpants and a t-shirt, softly laying out a second change of easy clothes for the sleeping girl.

Then he parked himself on the couch and turned on Comedy Central. After twenty minutes or so, he heard stumbling behind him.

“Hey,” Alex still sounded half-asleep, and quite positively hungover.

“Good morning.” Doug smiled. “Take a shower, if you want, or just sit down and watch tv with me. I already ordered us a pizza.”

Alex sat down, toying with her hair. “Did anything…?”

“No,” Doug shook his head. “You fell asleep on the couch, so I put you to bed and slept here myself.”

“That’s very, gentlemanly of you.” Alex smiled.

“I know right,” Doug yawned. “That’s me I guess.”

She punched him in the arm. “You’re a bastard.”

“I know right,” Doug smiled in the exact same tone. "That's me I guess."

They shared a silence, and Doug tried to determine whether it was a comfortable silence or an uncomfortable silence.

“I’m going to take a shower,” Alex announced.

“Pizza will probably be here in ten?” Doug said.

Alex nodded and walked towards the bathroom, which was next to the bedroom. He heard the water clatter on the shower tiles and shifted a little on the couch.

What was he going to do? He liked her, but he didn’t want to pressure her into anything. He didn’t want her to feel like she owed him anything because they would totally have gotten it off if he would’ve pushed through.

She didn’t owe him anything just because he treated her like he would want any other guy to treat his not-yet-existent daughter.

He was pulled out of his train of thoughts by the doorbell. The pizza had arrived! Doug jumped off the couch and grabbed his wallet to pay the delivery boy.

“Fourteen dollars please,” the boy said.

Doug gave him a twenty dollar note and was too awkward to ask back  _ half _ the change, so gave the boy a six dollar tip.

That was three beers.

He put the pizza’s on the living room table and pulled a slice out. He didn’t really have to wait for Alex, it would let the pizza go cold.

She came in a couple minutes later, her hair tied up with a band, wearing the t-shirt and sweatpants he put out for her.

They ate the first couple of slices in silence, until Doug said; “So, since, I mean, I had a great time last night and…”

“Douglas, are you trying to ask me out?” Alex smiled.

“No, I mean, yes, but…” Doug stammered.

“You don’t want me to feel obliged to say yes because of what happened last night?” Alex grinned, mouth full of cheese.

Doug nodded, a little awkward.

“I think it would be great to go out. But not drinking.”

“No, not drinking,” Doug grinned. “How about I take you out. You like Asian food? I know a great place.”

“Sure,” Alex nodded.

It was silent for a moment.

“You free tonight?” Doug asked.

“Eight?”

“Eight sounds awesome.”

After they finished the two pizza’s, Doug dropped Alex off at her place, so she could freshen up, let people know she wasn’t raped and killed and get over her hangover a little bit.

Back home, Doug watched some more tv, before getting ready.

He figured business casual would be suiting. Black jeans, nice shirt, sleeves rolled up (he had read somewhere that girls thought that was hot, rolling up your sleeves).

He pulled up on Alex’s porch at exactly 7:58. He honked once and Alex came out in a nice summer dress, slender heels and her blonde hair done up.

“Hey Douglas,” she said, sliding into the passenger seat. “Where are we going?”

“Petit Jardin,” he said.

“But that’s not an Asian restaurant.” Alex frowned.

“French,” Doug said. “I tried to make reservations at the Asian restaurant but they were full.”

“That’s okay,” Alex laughed. “Don’t sound so apologetic.”

Doug smiled nervously. “I’m just a little nervous.”

“Why?” Alex asked.

They pulled up in front of the restaurant. Doug got out and opened the door for his date.

“Dating is just, I haven’t done that in a while… I, uhm,” Doug shrugged.

“You usually pick up a girl in a bar, have a one-night stand and never speak to her again?” Alex asked.

“That’s usually a blacklisted subject for a first date, isn’t it?” Doug grinned.

They entered the restaurant, and a waitress greeted them. “Good evening,” she said with a slight French accent. “My name is Emilie, and I am your hostess tonight. If you have  _ any  _ questions, please do not hesitate to ask. Did you make a reservation?”

Doug nodded. “Under the name of Douglas Eiffel.”

“Ah, yes,” Emilie smiled. “Table for mister Eiffel.”

She chatted while she led them to the table. “You share your name with a great engineer.”

“Yes,” Doug nodded. “Gustave Eiffel, builder of the Eiffel tower.”

“You must get that a lot,” Emilie said.

“Well,” Doug replied, “Not really, since not a lot of people link the name of the tower to the engineer.”

They sat down. “Would you like to see the menu?”

“I would like to be surprised,” Doug said, looking at Alex.

“Me too,” His date nodded. “Just no olives please.”

Emilie nodded. “I will be back shortly with your appetizer.”

They talked the entire time, and Doug was so much more relaxed than at  _ any _ other date he ever had. He mentioned that during the last course, sweet strawberry meringues with a strikingly fresh white wine.

“Yes, but what other date did you meet, take home to have sex with to fall asleep on the couch?” Alex grinned.

“You have a point, I suppose,” Doug grinned. “No other date has ever had such a mouth on her, or insist on calling me ‘Douglas’, the entire time.”

“Does that bother you?” She asked.

“Not at all,” Doug smiled. “Not at all.”

“I’m really happy that that drunk idiot was bothering me right then, right there.” Alex smiled.

“Yeah, me too,” Doug grinned. “I really liked playing white knight.”

Alex nudged him under the table. “I  _ knew _ it.”

Emilie walked up to their table again, piling away their plates. “Would you like some coffee?”

Doug felt how Alex’s foot travelled up his leg. “I think we would like the bill, please.”

He coughed, and Alex smiled.

It wasn’t at all like in the movies, they couldn’t  _ not wait _ , and Doug calmly drove back to Alex’s place.

“Would you like to come in?” She asked.

“To pass out on your couch?” Doug replied.

Alex laughed and got out of the car, and he followed quickly, catching her in his arms the moment she closed the front door.

He kissed her, softly. Her breath smelled faintly of wine. Doug trailed down her neck, taking in a few moments to feel the softness of her skin.

“Did someone tell you that you look really hot with your sleeves rolled up?” She said breathlessly.

“You just did.” Doug grinned.

She walked backwards into the bedroom. “I bet that shirt looks even hotter on my floor…”

Doug started giggling. “Did you…”

“Oh God,” Alex laughed too. “Yes. That was a Parks and Recreation reference. I didn’t think you would… That must be such a turn-off.”

“Not at all,” Doug grinned. He unbuttoned his shirt and flung it away.

“See, Haverford was right…” Alex bit her lip. She pushed him back onto the bed and kissed him deeply.


	3. You had me at hello

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry it's been a while :)

Their relationship didn't progress the way you’d expect it to go. Alex was a full-time student with a weekend job, and Doug worked at Burger King as a manager. The only time they really got to see each other was Sunday evening, after Alex’s shift at the bookstore had ended.

They would spend the night and then they would have to deal with half hours during lunch breaks and getting coffee in the morning. Sometimes Alex would come over to study, but studying never ended in  _ actual studying _ , so she only did that if she didn't have important exams coming up.

That was also why Doug knew something was wrong when she asked if they could meet up on a Wednesday night.

“What about ice hockey?” He asked her over the phone. Alex gave training to young boys as part of her college credit.

“ _ This is more important than training. _ ” She replied.

“Are you…?” Doug frowned.

“ _ Don't worry, I'm not breaking up with you. _ ” Alex sighed. “ _ You might want to break up with me after this is over, though, _ ”

“Is everything okay?” Doug asked.

“ _ This is something I really don't want to do over the phone. _ ” Alex sighed. “ _ I’ll be at your place at seven. _ ”

“Okay,” Doug said. “I love you.”

“ _ I love you too, Douglas, _ ” Alex’s voice thickened with emotion.

The rest of the day, that phone call kept bugging Doug. He hated things like that; ‘I need to talk to you,’ or, ‘can I meet up with you later?’ without telling the reason why.

When his shift ended at five, he rushed home and took a quick shower, restlessly watching tv until the doorbell rang at three past six. He jumped up and nearly ran towards the door.

“Al!” He smiled, when he opened the door. At first glance, she looked okay. Her school bag under her arm, hair ruffled by the strong wind. “Come in! Do you want a drink? Coffee, tea? I was thinking…”

“Douglas, please,” Alex grabbed his wrists. “Let’s sit down first. I need this off my chest.”

Doug swallowed hard. “O-okay.” he walked her to the couch, and his palms turned cold with sweat. “Did I…?”

Alex took a deep, shaky breath. “I’m pregnant, Douglas.”

Doug opened his mouth to say something, and then he closed it again. His mind was blank.

“It’s okay if you want out,” Alex said, softly.

He tried saying something again, but all he could do was shake his head. “Ally- I…” He collected himself. “The last thing I want to do is leave you.”

Alex breathed out and made a sound that was somewhere in between a chuckle and a sob. He pulled her in for a hug. “Do you want to keep it?” he asked.

“I don’t know,” She breathed against his chest.

“Whatever your choice is, it’s our choice,” Doug nodded. “We’re in this together.”

She tilted her head. “I’m… I’m so happy that you said that. I was so afraid…”

“That I was going to leave you?” Doug smiled. “Nah. You had me at hello… or actually, at ‘I didn’t need your help’.”

Alex chuckled and kissed him. “I love you, Douglas Fernand Eiffel,”

Doug pulled back with a grimace, “My full name? That such a turn off.”

She bit her lip grinning. “But really? You’re okay with it?”

He shrugged. “Listen, sometimes, thing like that happen, no matter how careful you are. I'm a coward. I'm a low-witted idiot. I am used to running away from my problems. But this is something I don't want to run from. This is my responsibility as much as it is yours.”

“I’m glad you think about it that way,” Alex sighed.

Doug sat up, pulling Alex on his lap. “So, I mean, we’ll have to drastically change our lives, but are we going to pull this through.”

“If you want to…” Alex said.

“If we  _ both _ want to.” Doug nodded.

“Then yes,” Alex smiled. “Yes.”

Doug laughed. “Alex!” he said. “I’m going to be a pappa!”

The smile that spread on Alex’s face lit up the entire room. “A baby. Together.”

“Move in with me.” Doug said. “I know it’s a bachelor’s den, but I could straighten things out. We can make the guest room into a baby room, and that way you won’t have to give up on studying. I’ll take on extra hours at the Burger King, ask for a raise or a promotion. In the meanwhile I’ll look for a real job.”

“You hate office jobs.” Alex smiled.

“Not when I can come home to this,” Doug shook his head. “Alex, if you want, we can be  _ together _ together.”

“I’m so happy you reacted like this,” Alex said.

“So yes?”

“Yes.”

Doug swooped her up and set her down on her feet. “Put on your coat,” he said.

“What? Why?” Alex frowned.

“We’re celebrating.” Doug grabbed his girlfriend’s hand and pulled her to the hallway. “Dinner on me!”


End file.
